


My Immortal : Hetalia Style

by MehrunesDagonbro



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: F/M, Fun, M/M, Multi, Other, Parody, References to My Immortal, butchering of the English language, my immortal parody, shitposting, this should be cannon idgaf, will add more tags as i proceed
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-10
Updated: 2021-02-13
Packaged: 2021-03-13 23:09:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 1,354
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28661511
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MehrunesDagonbro/pseuds/MehrunesDagonbro
Summary: My Immortal: Hetalia Style's "story" covers the seventh year of Arthur "Artuury" Dark'ness Kirkland Raven Way at Hogwarts School in England, as well as the lives of his Goth friends, especially Francis Bonnefoy and Vampire Jones. There is something of a love triangle (pentagram, more like) between Arthur, Francis, and Vampire, because Francis and Vampire are both bisexual and apparently sex addicts. Others become temporarily involved in the saga of love, sex, white foundation and black eyeshadow. (Source: Wikipedia)Follow our goffik heroes as they try to murder both Prussiamort and the English language.THIS IS A PARODY OF THE ORIGINAL 'MY IMMORTAL' HARRY POTTER FANFIC. READ AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Relationships: America/England (Hetalia), Austria/Spain (Hetalia), England/France (Hetalia)
Comments: 12
Kudos: 23





	1. Chatpah uon

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, people! I wrote and published this piece of art back in 2016-ish in the other fanfiction site. Years went by and I found this gem hidden in my hardware, and it was too good not to share with yall.  
> So, 'My Immortal' is depicted the worst fanfic ever written, and I couldn’t agree more. It tells the story of a Mary Sue named Ebony Dark’ness Dementia Raven Way as she adventures herself in a Hogwarts full of goths and ‘preps’, self harm, a love triangle (or should I say, a love pentagram) that is worse than Twilight’s and general awfulness. Please take note that the grammar and spelling mistakes are not mine, and the parts that I modified are supposed to be bad.
> 
> Now, My Immortal Hetalia is basically a retelling of the infamous fic, only with the main characters replaced by Hetalia characters, but the horrible plot will remain untouched for comedy issues.  
> Here’s the cast:  
> Ebony/Enoby/Eboby/Tarebony- England  
> Draco Malfoy- France  
> Willow/AN-Raven, dis is u!- Russia  
> B’loody Mary/Hermione Granger- China  
> Vampire Potter- America  
> Dumbledore/Doubledoor- Germany  
> Voldemort/Volxemort- Prussia  
> Professor McGoogle/McGonagall- North Italy  
> Hagrid/HAHgrid/Hairgrid- Canada  
> Professor Snape/Snap- Austria  
> Professor Lupin/Loopin- Spain  
> So, those are the characters from My Immortal that I actually remember, maybe there’ll be more as we progress with the ‘story’.  
> For the people who don’t know the original story, since England is Ebony, France is Draco and Vampire is America, there will be an eventual FranceXEnglandXAmerica (or rather EnglandXFranceXAmerica), but I wouldn’t take this very seriously!  
> Now, let’s embark in this amazing and touching story.  
> I’m pleased to tell that I don’t own My Immortal.  
> P.S. I am noot responsiably fur ur looss off neurroons!

Chapter 1.

AN: Special fangz (get it, coz Im goffik) 2 my gf (ew not in that way) raven, bloodytearz666 4 helpin me wif da story and spelling. U rok! Justin ur da luv of my deprzzing life u rok 2! MCR ROX!  
  
Hi my name is Arthur Dark’ness Kirkland Raven Way and I have short blond hair with purple streaks and red tips that reaches my shoulders and acidic green eyes like lettuce and a lot of people tell me I look like Jack Gleeson (AN: if u don't know who he is get da hell out of here!). I'm not related to Gerard Way but I wish I was because he's a major fucking hottie. I'm a vampire but my teeth are straight and white. I have pale white skin. I'm also a wizard, and I go to a magic school called Hogwarts in England where I'm in the seventh year (I'm seventeen). I'm a goth (in case you couldn't tell) and I wear mostly black. I love Hot Topic and I buy all my clothes from there. For example today I was wearing a black male corset with matching lace around it and a black leather pair of tight pants and black combat boots. I was wearing black lipstick, white foundation, black eyeliner and red eye shadow. I was walking outside Hogwarts. It was snowing and raining so there was no sun, which I was very happy about. A lot of preps stared at me. I put up my middle finger at them.  
  
"Hey Arthur!" shouted a voice. I looked up. It was... Francis Bonnefoy!  
  
"What's up Francis?" I asked.  
  
"Nothing." he said shyly.  
  
But then, I heard my friends call me and I had to go away.  
  
AN: IS it good? PLZ tell me fangz!


	2. Chapata tuo

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I dont own da originnual fanfik bcuz iam a prep.  
> My author’s notes are in bold, provinding insightful commentary on this literary masterpiece.

AN: Fangz 2 bloodytearz666 4 helpin me wif da chapta! BTW preps stop flaming ma story ok!

The next day I woke up in my bedroom. It was snowing and raining again. I opened the door of my coffin and drank some blood from a bottle I had **(a/n: So, Starbloods Coffee? Arthur seems more like a basic bitch)**. My coffin was black ebony and inside it was hot pink velvet with black lace on the ends. I got out of my coffin and took of my giant MCR t-shirt which I used for pajamas. Instead, I put on a black shirt, black leather coat and a pair of black skinny jeans ripped all over from my tights to my ankles, a pentagram necklace and combat boots. I put on four pairs of earrings in my pierced ears, and put my hair in a kind of short messy bun.  
  
My friend, Ivan woke up then and grinned at me. He flipped his somewhat long platinum blond hair with pink streaks and opened his violet eyes. He put on his Marilyn Manson t-shirt with a black pair of ripped denim shorts and black vans with skulls drawn all over them. We put on our makeup (black lipstick white foundation and black eyeliner.) and Ivan put on pentagram piercings on his big nose.  
  
"OMFG, I saw you talking to Francis Bonnefoy yesterday!" he said excitedly.  
  
"Yeah? So?" I said, blushing.  
  
"Do you like Francis?" he asked as we went out of the Slytherin common room and into the Great Hall.  
  
"No I so fucking don't!" I shouted.  
  
"Yeah right!" he exclaimed. Just then, Francis walked up to me.  
  
"Hi." he said.  
  
"Hi." I replied flirtily.  
  
"Guess what." he said.  
  
"What?" I asked.  
  
"Well, Good Charlotte are having a concert in Hogsmeade." he told me.  
  
"Oh. My. Fucking. God!" I screamed. I love GC. They are my favorite band, besides MCR. **(a/n: that fucking conversation)**  
  
"Well... do you want to go with me?" he asked.  
  
I gasped. **(a/n: so did I, but out of pity)**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So we embark now on the touching story of love between Arthur Dark’ness Kirkland Raven Way and Francis Bonnefoy. I hope I won’t go nuts before we finish our 44 chapter ride!  
> More 42 chapters to go.  
> Tankiu for da comments and cudus, my gottik readers! If you don't ur a prep


	3. Xapter tri

AN: STOP FLAMMING DA STORY PREPZ OK! odderwize fangs 2 da goffik ppl 4 da good reveiws! FANGS AGEN RAVEN! oh yeah, BTW I don't own dis or da lyrics 4 Good Chralotte.

  
On the night of the concert I put on my black lace-up boots with heels. Then I put on a black leather tight shirt with all this corset stuff on the back and front and a pair of black ripped jeans. I straightened my hair and made it look all spiky. I felt a little depressed then, so I slit one of my wrists. I read a depressing book while I waited for it to stop bleeding and I listened to some GC. I painted my nails black and put on TONS of black eyeliner. Then I put on some black lipstick. I didn't put on foundation because I was pale anyway. I drank some human blood so I was ready to go to the concert.  
  
I went outside. Francis was waiting there in front of his flying car. He was wearing a Simple Plan t-shirt (they would play at the show too), baggy black skater pants, black nail polish and a little eyeliner (AN: A lot fo kewl boiz wer it ok!).  
  
"Hi Francis!" I said in a depressed voice.  
  
"Hi Arthur." he said back. We walked into his flying black Mercedes-Benz (the license plate said 666) and flew to the place with the concert. On the way we listened excitedly to Good Charlotte and Marilyn Manson. We both smoked cigarettes and drugs. When we got there, we both hopped out of the car. We went to the mosh pit at the front of the stage and jumped up and down as we listened to Good Charlotte.  
  
"You come in cold, you're covered in blood They're all so happy you've arrived The doctor cuts your cord, hands you to your mom She sets you free into this life." sang Joel (I don't own da lyrics 2 dat song).  
  
"Joel is so fucking hot." I said to Francis, pointing to him as he sung, filling the club with his amazing voice.  
  
Suddenly Francis looked sad.  
  
"What's wrong?" I asked as we moshed to the music. Then I caught on.  
  
"Hey, it's ok I don't like him better than YOU!" I said.  
  
"Really?" asked Francis sensitively and he put his arm around me all protective.  
  
"Really." I said. "Besides I don't even know Joel and he's going out with Hilary fucking Duff. I fucking hate that little bitch." I said disgustedly, thinking of her ugly blonde face.  
  
The night went on really well, and I had a great time. So did Francis. After the concert, we drank some beer and asked Benji and Joel for their autographs and photos with them. We got GC concert tees. Francis and I crawled back into the Mercedes-Benz, but Francis didn't go back into Hogwarts, instead he drove the car into... the Forbidden Forest!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dun, dun, dun! That’s too much suspense for me to handle! I don’t think I can do it!  
> koment and qudo my gottik redurs!


	4. Tchapter flour

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, yall, my author's notes are in bold.

AN: I sed stup flaming ok arthur's nut mary su OK! FRANCIS IS SOO IN LUV wif him dat he is acting defrent! dey nu eechodder b4 ok!  
  


"FRANCIS!" I shouted. "What the fuck do you think you are doing?"  
  
Francis didn't answer but he stopped the flying car and he walked out of it. I walked out of it too, curiously.  
  
"What the fucking hell?" I asked angrily.  
  
"Arthur?" he asked.  
  
"What?" I snapped.  
  
Francis leaned in extra-close and I looked into his gothic red eyes (he was wearing color contacts) which revealed so much depressing sorrow and evilness and then suddenly I didn't feel mad anymore.  
  
And then... suddenly just as I Francis kissed me passionately. Francis climbed on top of me and we started to make out keenly against a tree. He took of my top and I took of his clothes. Then he put his thingie into my you-know-what and we did it for the first time. **_(A/N- I love the way this is so immature that it fits with my parody without any modifications XD)_**  
  
"Oh! Oh! Oh! " I screamed. I was beginning to get an orgasm. We started to kiss everywhere and my pale body became all warm. And then...  
  
"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING YOU MOTHERFUKERS!"  
  
It was…Beilschmidt!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So yeah, many FrUK feels in this chapter, right?  
> With a single kudo, you can help make the world safer from preps.

**Author's Note:**

> There you have it. Chapter 1. 43 more to go, yay. I'll be posting once a week-ish I guess. It's surprisingly difficult to find the entire original work available to parody lol


End file.
